Marriage in Islam is a divine bond between a man and a woman that allows for the development of one’s physical, moral and spiritual faculties. In Islam, marriage provides a means of satisfying natural desires within a protected and safe environment. This helps in preventing the degradation of the moral fiber of society. Marriage is sacred in Islam as it strengthens the family unit and, with it, the building blocks of a successful society.
What is Marriage in Islam?
Marriage in Islam is a legal contract between a man and a woman. Its purpose is to satiate the natural desires of both parties in a manner that safeguards the modesty and dignity of the individuals. Islam teaches that the physical state of humankind has a direct impact on the moral and spiritual condition. The ultimate purpose of marriage is to win the pleasure of Allah (God) by doing right by His creation.
Impact of Marriage on the Individual
Marriage provides peace and comfort to both individuals as stated in The Holy Qur’an,
‘And one of His Signs is this, that He has created wives for you from among yourselves that you may find peace of mind in them, and He has put love and tenderness between you. In that, surely, are Signs for a people who reflect.’ (The Holy Qur’an 30:22)
The relationship between spouses helps refine their moral qualities as they learn to love and care for one another. The tenderness that develops through this process allows them to remain mindful of the suffering of others, instilling compassion for everyone in society.
Also, marriage helps maintain the mental and physical health of an individual. Numerous studies show that married people are happier, healthier, drink less, and have greater life satisfaction.
Impact of Marriage on Society
According to Islam, marriage impacts society in two main ways:
1) through the development of righteous morals, and
2) through children.
To establish a peaceful society, values such as righteousness must first be established inside every home. Here, the character and conduct of the husband and wife is vital as children imitate the actions of their parents. Therefore, The Holy Qur’an advises that those entering a marriage should do so with taqwa (righteousness and love of God) (The Holy Qur’an 33:71-72; 59:19).
In Islam, marriage is considered the building block of a virtuous society. As it is a legal union with obligations on each party, marriage helps ensure the morality of society. Healthy family units help ensure human preservation.
Significance of Marriage in Islam
Marriage is important in Islam for three main reasons:
1) to allow a man and woman to live together within Islamic law,
2) to produce children, and
3) to protect society from bad moral and social practices (e.g., western dating and fornication).
By living together, a man and woman are able to satisfy their natural desires and produce children. By restricting the fulfillment of these natural urges within the structure of marriage allows for a society in whose morals are protected (Saeed, 2024).
The Holy Prophet (pbuh) laid great emphasis on marriage, saying, “When a man has married, he has completed one half of his religion” (Saeed, 2004). Meaning, marriage is considered an important duty in Islam which should try to be fulfilled by all Muslims.
Some Conditions for Marriage in Islam
There are four main conditions surrounding marriage in Islam:
1) a marriage cannot be entered without consent from both the man and the woman,
2) Muslims cannot marry family members such as a mother, father, sister, brother, aunt, uncle, nephew, or niece; however, Muslims are permitted to marry their cousins (The Holy Qur’an 4:23-24),
3) marrying an idolater is strictly forbidden (e.g., an idol worshipper, someone who does not believe in God) (The Holy Qur’an 2:222), and
4) women are not permitted to marry men outside of their faith (e.g., a Muslim woman can only marry a Muslim man. However, a Muslim man is permitted to marry women of the ‘people of the book’ (e.g., those that follow a revealed scripture) (Saeed, 2024).
These conditions are in place to protect the Islamic faith as family units are formed. The first condition in particular helps ensure a just and amicable start to the relationship.
What are the Required Marriage Celebrations in Islam?
There are two required celebrations for marriage in Islam:
1) the nikah (the marriage contract) and
2) the walima (the wedding reception).
The nikah ceremony consists of the officiant announcing the marriage, obtaining consent from both parties and announcing the mehr (dowry owed by the groom). This is done in the presence of the guardians of both parties and at least two witnesses from each side (Ahmad, 2018).
The second required religious celebration is the reception held by the groom’s side, the walima, after the nikah. This reception was the practice of Prophet Muhammad (sa) and is considered a mandatory part of the marriage celebration. It should be organized according to one’s means and family and friends should be invited (Ahmad, 2018).
Rights and Responsibilities in the Marriage
To safeguard the relationship between husband and wife, Islam has outlined specific roles and responsibilities that each individual should fulfill. By doing so, a successful, happy and peaceful marriage can be achieved that will win the pleasure of God.
Responsibilities of the Husband
In The Holy Qur’an, the husband has been assigned as a guardian for his wife (The Holy Qur’an 4:35). When looking at the life of Prophet Muhammad (sa), the responsibilities of this role are made quite clear. The husband is responsible for providing for all the reasonable needs of his wife and children. He is advised not to be stingy in this regard. To this effect, the wife and children have a share of whatever he earns. If the wife is earning as well, her earnings belong only to her. There is no obligation upon her to use her earnings for the husband or the household.
The husband is responsible for treating his wife in a gentle and loving manner. He should be a source of comfort for her, be loyal to her and look after her well-being. His behaviours should include:
Responsibilities of the Wife
The wife is responsible for looking after her husband, his property and his children while also protecting and upholding his honour. Other responsibilities include:
The wife is also advised to give sincere advice to her husband when he seeks her counsel. Additionally, she should not make unreasonable financial demands from her husband that become a source of anxiety for him. The wife should try to raise the children in the best possible manner. She should help ensure the environment of the house remains peaceful and loving (Ahmad, 1988).
Is Marriage Obligatory in Islam?
Marriage is obligatory in Islam as God encourages every Muslim to marry (Kaleem, 1992). The Fifth Caliph and worldwide Head of the Ahmadiyya Muslim Community, His Holiness, Hazrat Mirza Masroor Ahmad (aba) has mentioned that ‘marriage is one of Islam’s fundamental commandments for Muslims’.
Marriage is a sunnah (practice of the Holy Prophet (sa)) as the Holy Prophet (sa) has said:
‘Marriage is part of my sunnah, and whoever does not follow my sunnah has nothing to do with me. Get married, for I will take pride in your great numbers before other nations. Whoever has the means, let him get married, and whoever does not, then he should fast, for it will diminish his desire.’ (Sunan Ibn Majah 1846) (Al Hakam, 2022).
What Does Quran and Hadith Say About Marriage?
There are two main verses in The Holy Qur’an regarding marriage, all involving the importance of kindness, fairness and love between husband and wife. First, God says in The Holy Qur’an:
‘And Allah has made for you mates from among yourselves’ (The Holy Qur’an 16:73).
The verse describes how God has given the same status to both men and women, therefore, women should not be looked down upon by men. Secondly, God mentions in The Holy Qur’an:
‘He it is who created you from a single soul and made therefore its mate, that he might find comfort in her’ (The Holy Qur’an 7:190).
The verse mentions that marriage is meant to provide mutual love and affection between spouses, allowing them to obtain companionship.
There are many hadith (sayings of the Holy Prophet (sa)) regarding marriage, however, key one on this topic is:
‘O company of the youth! He who can afford to marry should marry, for it keeps the eyes cast down and keeps the man chaste; and he who cannot afford to marry should take to fasting for it will have a sobering effect upon him’ (Sahih Bukhari 5066).
In this hadith, the Holy Prophet (sa) mentions the importance of marriage in a society and its protection of humanity. A man who can afford to marry but chooses not to will most definitely be led to immorality (Kaleem, 1992).
What are the Key Qualities of a Successful Marriage?
The Holy Prophet (sa) has mentioned two key qualities of spouses in a successful marriage: righteous spirituality and character. When the Holy Prophet (sa) was asked regarding what to look for in a potential wife, he said:
‘A woman is married for four things, her wealth, her family status, her beauty and her religion. So you should marry a religious woman (otherwise) you will be losers (Sahih Bukhari 5090).
The physical and superficial aspects of both men and women diminish overtime. Therefore, it is their faith and religious values that contribute to a healthier marriage in the long run (Mbowe, 2019).
When the Holy Prophet (sa) was asked about what to look for in a husband, he said:
‘When someone with whose religion and character you are satisfied asks to marry your daughter, comply with his request. If you do not do so, there will be corruption and great evil on earth.’ (Tirmidhi 1084). Meaning that women in Islam are encouraged to marry God-fearing men of character.
What Should be Considered in a Proposal?
Islam guides an individual to look for the following when considering a proposal:
Islam advises individuals to take other factors into account when considering a proposal. Generally, Muslims are advised to marry someone who is equal to them. For this reason, asking questions relating to education, finances, family backgrounds, age and health are all valid.
Prophet Muhammad (sa) also advised Muslims to meet the potential partner in person. This must be done under the supervision of guardians as meeting privately is not permissible in Islam.
An important Islamic concept when it comes to marriage is qual-e-sadid (truthfulness). Islam necessitates that both parties be open and upfront about any issues that may lead to strains on the marriage if concealed and discovered later (Ahmad, 2019). For example, if someone has a specific health problem, this should be shared during this process.
Conclusion
Marriage is a divine blessing provided to humankind for the development of greater morals, individual happiness, and the safeguarding of the human population (Cheema, 2008). It is a great responsibility that comes with mutual obligations for both the husband and the wife. When these obligations are fulfilled with piety, righteousness, and mutual respect, marriage can result in lasting bliss, a peaceful outcome for the family and general society.
There are many related topics regarding which Islam gives guidance. These include family planning, birth control and abortion, divorce, polygamy and more. Interested readers can learn more from the sources linked below.
Sources
Ahmad, M. M. (2018). Marriage: Contract between Husband and Wife. In Domestic Issues and Their Solutions (pp. 19–22). Islam International Publications Limited.
Ahmad, M. M. (2019). Chapter 1: Match Finding. In Garments for Each Other: Selected Excerpts about Marital Harmony (pp. 1–12). Lajna Section Markazia.
Ahmad, S. M. (1988). Islam on Marital Rights (pp. 18). Islam International Publications Limited.
Al Hakam (2022). Why is marriage obligatory in Islam? Islam Ahmadiyya.https://www.alhakam.org/why-is-marriage-obligatory-in-islam/
Cheema, M. A. (2008). Purpose of Marriage. In Islamic Teachings on Ideal Family Life (pp. 14–16). Ahmadiyya Movement in Islam.
Kaleem, A. U. (1992). Marriage in Islam. Islam Ahmadiyya.https://www.alislam.org/articles/marriage-in-islam/
Mbowe, O. (2019). Finding Our Spouse – Completing Our Faith. Islam Ahmadiyya. https://www.alislam.org/articles/finding-our-spouse-completing-our-faith/
The Holy Qur’an (Maulawi Sher ‘Ali, Trans.). (2021). Islam International Publications Limited.
Saeed, R. (2024). Chapter 3: The Islamic Marriage System. In Pathway to Paradise (pp. 49-57). Islam International Publications Limited.